The Case of The Alright Guys vs The Alien Attack Brownie

One weekend a few years ago, I found myself staying with Alright Guy Jimbob for a couple of days. Whether this was planned or due to my vehicle breaking down near his residence, I cannot recall. Both were fairly common occurrences at the time. Regardless, I was there for some Twisted Metal Black, some Warlords Battlecry II and a little Icewind Dale II action as I recall.

Anyhow, at some point we decided that food and drink were in order and we made the 5 minute journey to the friendly neighborhood Meijer store. Mountain Dew was acquired, as were Doritos, frozen pizzas and beef jerky. I also had to stop by the bakery area, as I had a powerful lust for pastries. On the way to the donut vending area, I noticed something: A Meijer bakery product labelled "Alien Attack Brownie." It was about 6 square inches and appeared to be an ordinary brownie. I asked Jimbob the obvious question: what makes this particular brownie an alien attack brownie? Was there some flavored green substance in the middle? Maybe little green doughy aliens? Maybe it increased one's chances of being noticed, abducted and attacked by aliens which would explain its being on sale. Most people wouldn't pay full price for that.

We bought the alien attack brownie and took it back to the apartment. We opened it up, sliced and served it. We never could have guessed what it was that gave that brownie it's name. And we never did. There was nothing unusual or remarkable about the brownie in any way. I think was the first I'd seen of marketing directly to Nuts people. They took a common product and slapped a stupid label on it so some weirdo would buy it. And buy it we did.

We finished the brownie.