How Eric Cheeseburger picks up Chicks

Needless to say, if this headline caught your attention you're an Eric Cheeseburger fan. If not, it's because you don't know the legacy. He's the one who taught us all about slots, he's the one Mr. Nuts set loose on me during the release of Jurassic Park 3, He's the King for crying out loud!

Now, if you thought this was going to be an Eric Cheeseburger sighting, I hate to shit in your cereal, but it isn't. But it's close enough though, and any excuse to put that picture in the top of my article is excuse enough. Basically imagine Eric Cheeseburger hitting his 20's, unable to pick up chicks, and desperate for help. So he changes his name to "Bobby Batronic", gets some contact lenses, subscribes to a the Perfect Dating video dating service, and I think it would go something like this. I hope you enjoy.