Game Review: God of War

God of War
System: Playstation 2
Publisher: Sony
Released: 2005
Players: 1

For you impatient ones out there, here is a two word review for God of War:

Fucking Awesome.

For everyone else, here's a review:

Though gaming has seen its fair share of iconic characters, few have been real badasses. Mario, Sonic and Link have always had humorous, fun sides to them. Dante from the Devil May Cry series was, until recently, the coolest, most ass-kickingest video game character I'd ever played as. Kratos, the main character in God of War is the nastiest, cruelest, most intimidating game character I've ever seen. Dante had a tongue in cheek sort of sense of style and coolness to his act. Kratos fucks shit up with no pretenses. There's no swagger, no smirk, no taunting. Just blood, blood and more blood.

One of the scenes that makes God of War a classic: An epic battle with a hydra aboard a ship.

God of War is rated 'M' and with good reason. This game is on par with a very R rated film, definitely not for kids. It's truly a game for adults, much more so than Grand Theft Auto (cursing, lockerroom jokes and handguns don't make you a grownup.) GoW is definitely not for the squeamish, as you'll see blood spraying everywhere during cutscenes and gameplay. The game's excellent story puts the violence into context though. This is a game of battle and greek gods. Kratos is a spartan warrior who sold his soul to Ares, the God of War, in exchange for victory on the field of battle. As is typical in greek mythology, the price was higher than Kratos was willing to pay. This is a tale of a mortal's vengeance against a god. In his travels, Kratos will also meet up with Zeus, Posiedon, Athena and others.

Beat him to death with your bare hands? Tear him in half? Ram your sword through his chest? Decisions, decisions....

You begin the game with little knowledge of Kratos, only that he is a heartless, bloodthirsty, vicious bastard. The game slowly feeds you Kratos' story through cutscenes. The story is powerful, the battle is exhilirating and the puzzles are well distributed. Kratos really feels like a one man army, and it's easy to get in character during the game. Walking into a room full of enemies and what should be overwhelming odds, I was simply determined and confident that I'd tear every last one of them apart. The combat is fast and intense, and before long you'll be stringing together combos and tearing your foes apart with Kratos' Blades of Chaos - these were his 'gift' from Ares: twin blades at the end of chains which are soldered onto his flesh. Kratos can literally tear his foes in two.

The game starts out on a ship which is being attacked by a massive hydra. This first stage sets the tone for the game very well. Along the way you'll visit Athens, Hades and eventually the Temple of Pandora to retrieve Pandora's box. The temple was built by an architect who slaved for the gods and everntually went insane. Pandora's Box is the stuff of legend, and its retrieval is a suitably monumental task in the game. The game definitely has its share of memorable moments. The first time I laid eyes on Ares was one of those 'holy shit' moments for me. "I have to kill HIM?!?" Pandora's temple is chock full of traps, puzzles and general unpleasantness. One such area has Kratos running down a hallway while huge flaming boulders are rolling at him. My fiance' was cheering and gasping as I dodged the flaming rocks. It was like watching Indiana Jones or something.

Kratos handling crowd control.

The overall presentation of the game is splendid: from graphics to music to narration the game really has an epic feel to it. God of War is simply an incredible experience all around. A few of the jumping puzzles had me cursing a bit, but none of them were impossible. Some just took 10 or 15 tries. God of War is one of the finest action/adventure games ever made. Or a better way to put would be "Oh my fucking god, this game is awesome!"

4 big Kratos heads out of 4