It Ain't None of my BID-NESS

To get the full effect from this blog, imagine it being narrated by Solid Snake - Jimbob

This story takes place several years ago. We found ourselves at the end of a Gencon Weekend. We were spending the evening dismembering several small stuffed animals we had hustled from an arcade a few days before.

Oh, there were heads, feet, arms.. Pretty much anything that could come off came off. The stuffed animal foam was EVERYWHERE. Without a vaccum, cleanup was quite difficult. It was my first trip to Milwaukee you see, and the grand finale had just finished. Stuffed animal carnage. I believe there's a video.

Part of the game is to place the parts in unsuspecting places for the housekeeping staff to find them. I believe a few of the animals switched heads and ended up in the closet. some in the bathroom, one on the fire escape maybe, that I can't be sure of.

Anyways, as one of our people was paying, the others were loading the car, I discovered that our hatchet was nowhere to be found. We couldn't leave without the hatchet. It's a symbol, and I for one, am very tied to symbols.

I went back inside. I knew it was dangerous, but I had to go. If our hatchet was in there, I had to bring it out. As I got off the elevator, there was a commotion in the hallway. The housekeepers were distressed. I could tell in their voices. The one lady was saying over and over in a very Rich Southern accent.. "IT AIN'T NONE OF MY BID-NESS" I remember she had tears.

I heard them whisper when I rounded the corner. "I think that's one of them." So, rather than be fingered as the bad guy without my backup, I simply passed by our room. The door was open and the trashbag was outside. In it were bits of stuffed animals.