The Wife of an Alright Guy

Hello! I don't post much. I'm not really much of a ranter, though I've been told I've done a few worthwhile ones in the past. Unfortunately, those we're through email before this site was set up and are long gone (I think anyway). Why don't I rant much? Well, that's easy, I don't need to. I married an Alright Guy. And as I've found out along the way, it's kind of like marrying into the mob. In fact, I was actually told on my wedding day that I wasn't just marrying Couch, I was marrying the Alright Guys...all of them. (Yikes!) And while they have all managed to at least stay out of my bedroom (well, except for Couch), they have definately inflitrated my life more than I ever imagined. Now you might ask why I married into this organization, as surely I must have known about it beforehand. Well, you are half correct. I know that the A.G.'s existed. I had met all of them. However, all but one of them lived in places other than where Couch and I would be living. Therefore, they weren't really a huge part of our lives other than the occasional weekend visit or whathaveyou. And while I knew their history and all that jazz, I had been informed that the group was now disbanded. In my eyes, they were a silly group of guys that had a silly little "club" in high school that was now growing up and going in different directions. Oh how wrong I was...

Without getting into the whole history and whatnot, which I would be sure to screw up anyway, let me just say this...the Alright Guys are still alive and well. The only difference is that the exact member cast has changed some along the way. In place of a couple displaced A.G's (who may or may not still hold rank, I have no idea), there is at least one new A.G. that I know of. And, in addition to me, there is finally another A.G. wife in the picture (after being the only one for the last 5 years, I'm more than happy to share that role).

And what exactly is the role of an A.G. wife you might ask? Well, it's not all that different than the role of any other wife, except that more understanding is required on your part. Being that I've been the other half of the only married A.G. thusfar, our house is often the get together spot. This I don't mind. Don't mind at all. In fact, I rather like cooking for and entertaining the A.G.'s. Especially since most of them like my meatloaf, and chili cheese dip, and other munchies. Not that I really entertain them. I just feed them I guess. They entertain themselves. That's where the understanding part comes in. See, in most typical situations, you entertain for a couple of hours and that's that. Not with the A.G.s. They may arrive at your house at 10am in the morning and not leave until 10am or later the next day. And none of them would even think twice about this fact. And once or twice this has happened because the roads got bad or whathaveyou and someone asked to sleep on our couch, but more often than not, it's simply because they are still entertaining themselves for that long! And how are they doing this you might ask? Well, they usual method is by playing a game called Dungeons and Dragons (or D&D for short) . Other methods have included marathon gaming sessions in which laptops are connected to our network to make it even larger and they all go kill bad guys together (or whatever they do, I don't really get into the video games they play), or another favorite pastime of theirs is breaking things. Hey, that reminds me of a story...

They were breaking a microwave in my driveway one day. Not just breaking it, they had baseball bats, a sledgehammer (my husband is also a carpenter with man tools), etc...and they were videotaping themselves as well. Typically this is a pre-Gencon ritual, but this particular day it was a just because thing (just because our microwave had died and we'd bought a new one I think). I didn't mind too much because we really don't have any neighbors except for one older couple that lives across the street and is gone a lot. Unfortunately, they were home on this particular day and came outside to get in their van to leave right during the middle of the microwave breaking. I was concerned. What the heck are the neighbors going to think? The elder gentleman backed out of his driveway on to the road. Looked at the A.G.s in my driveway, rolled down his window and asked "what was that thing?". Someone answered back that it was a microwave. He said something back along the lines of having wanted to do that to one himself once or twice. I was taken aback. My normal neighbors didn't appear to even bat an eyelash at the maniacs killing a microwave in my driveway. Of course, this could simply be because after living across from us for 6 years, they have seen all kinds of weird things going on here. Who knows. At least they still let there teenage daughter babysit for us.

So where was I going with all of this...I don't even remember anymore. I think I was going to tell you all what it's like being the wife of an A.G. but I guess it really doesn't matter much to anyone other those of us who are the wifes of one. And at this current date, that's only me and one other delightful woman. Although, I am told that over the Christmas holidays, yet another wonderful lady actually agreed to marry yet another Alright Guy. (Congratulations Kat & Mr. Nuts!) That only leaves one more current member to marry off (or maybe not, but no one ever answered my email about that). Although it did just occur to me that there is another A.G. wife out there. I just don't know her well. The A.G. she's married to doesn't come around much. I'm thinking he may be considered a "former A.G.".

Watch for my next post...which I'm thinking may be more interesting...where I will let you all know just what it's like to raise kids with an Alright Guy. Oye Vey.